Since 9:00am this morning, I have been experiencing New York. No visual representations from Woody Allen as my only reference, I am actually here. I’ve had too many sangrias to get into it too much and I’ll have to post a follow-up post later.
Man, this is definitely a different city than Chicago.
Truth be told, I haven’t been here in awhile. I got rid of Facebook, Twitter (it’s up but not active) and I may get rid of IG. Social media, more than ever, is turning me off. I can’t contain the fact anymore that it’s making me feel like I’m complete “s***” and everyone else is awesome.
It’s time to detox, watch some movies. You know, have fun in a pre-2000s kind of way
My mother was an all-nighter thanks to her choice of her employment (Programmer). In her attempts to try for a normal nights sleep, she would often randomly awaken to finish a chore, watch a movie or ponder her life. Although giving into insomnia seems the best route, it meant that she would have to contend with being irritable and groggy the rest of the day.
For the past few days I have experienced this. Unlike my mother, I work in an office with other people and therefore need to be on the up and up in every aspect. I can’t help but think that my choice of gulten-free pizza helped me in my ability to sleep given that after getting up at 11pm, I went right back to sleep. No aromatherapy needed.
I’m not sure if I stated this before, but I do struggle with making good choices when it comes to eating. I’m rather used to Uber, Doordash and other delivery services doing the work for me that I never know what to make when I don’t want any delivery. Someone who reads this blog who is into food could probably make a suggestion for me as I truly believe that my body should be given better choices to eat.
At this point, I could simply just eat some soup and be happy with that and hopefully my body will feel the same way too. Sleep is often a problem for me and was a problem for my mother, but I vow to correct that as much as possible.
One of the things that my mother was very good at was going her own way, even if the way she chose didn’t always produce a positive result. As a young man, she allowed me to go to the store myself and learn how to travel to places and, at the very least, figure out how to ask people where I’m going when I don’t know where I am. Such an idea seems ancient, to reach out for help to a stranger, since Google is supposed to be your friend.
Google, while having the most supposedly real-world map of the world, is not as helpful as one might think.
I recognize there are dangers everywhere in cities that are big and small. There are however a few basics I follow which may or may not have to do with my upbringing. Here they are:
I’m going to New York, dangerous or not, I have to start living and getting out of this city and do something else besides waddle in my misery.
- Never walk aimlessly at night unless you have somewhere to go.,
- Always have a mode of transportation.,
- Always let people who your friends/relatives know where you are.
- If the place you see looks dangerous, it is.
I booked a ticket to New York for the middle of August. It’s an expensive endeavor to be sure, but no more expensive than buying yet another computer (which I did this weekend). I’m looking to expand my horizons and get out of Chicago and go on an adventure that the Internet has no hand in.
I’ve asked people what places to see and how to survive as a mere tourist rather than someone who has lived the city. The answers I get are helpful, but I’m not completely on board with following someone else’s idea of enjoyment these days. I’d like to make up my own mind.
Less anxiety that way.
Before I even get that far, I need to worry about what I’m going to take with me. That in itself will prove to be a journey.
I generally don’t like to go on about social/political issues given how toxic the environment is these days. After attending a group session where I listened to others talk about their grief, I came to one conclusion; women should be allowed to speak. I say this as a man, who as men generally do, get a chance to speak.
If a woman is constantly made to feel like her voice doesn’t matter, then she will get used to not speaking up when it’s necessary to her own well-being, or to the well-being of others. I don’t know if this would be considered a failing of mine, but I always prefer others to speak over me having to speak first.
Everyone’s story is valid, especially a woman’s.